leah's christmas present

i know i'm irrational. you don't have to tell me. but, there are some dreams i guess i'm just not willing to let go. and leah's christmas present this year was one of them. 

rewind 26 years. i was three and i had just been gifted the best. present. ever. yellow, red and blue plastic, adjustable, fisher price roller skates. once i inserted my feet, i don't think i took them off for weeks. maybe months. gliding aroudn in those beauties is actually one of my very first memories - and it's pretty vivid. for years, i've known that if i had a daughter, she would get similar roller skaes for her own third birthday.

fast forward for february 2010 - leah's third birthday. i thought about it. yup - it definitely crossed my mind on multiple occasions, but we had recently received {ever so reluctantly} leah's diagnosis and i was heart broken. roller skating carefree around the house was something my three year old daughter would never do. the idea of roller skates were flushed down the toilet with a bushelful of other dreams.

a month or two later, i snapped out of it. sure, leah would never skate around by herself. but that didn't mean i couldn't help her experience the joy i felt. she'd just experience it in a different way. i decided she could have roller skates for christmas. 

fast forward to august 2010. we were in utah on vacation with ryan's friends and leah was at grandma and grandpa layton's house. they emailed us each night with an update on leah's daily activities and included pictures of what they had done. running through sprinklers, playing at the park, swimming in the backyard, wearing new princess jammies. one night we read that they bought leah rollerskates - and attacked a picture of the excitement.

i burst into tears. 

ryan got a look on his face as if to say, "why is my wife crazy?" and he had every right to do so. i blubbered through my explanation beginning with my own roller skates, including my disappointment on leah's third birthday and my resolve to get her skates that upcoming december. after a lot of talking, we decided we'd ask his parents if we could have those skates be just for grandma and grandpa's house so i could get leah her own pair for christmas. 

i know they thought it was irrational. ryan thought i was being ridiculous. and, sentiment aside, i could see that too. i felt awful. but, the sentiment and the years of dreams couldn't be laid aside. not this time. 

to make sure it was something leah wanted as well, we looked at lots of skates online. her face lit up when we talked about them. we looked at gray skates, red skates, white skates, blue skates. but none got a grin so big as did the hot pink ones. 

when i asked if she wanted santa to bring her roller skates her silent answer was undeniable. it was written all over her face. and so, december 2010, my little three year old got her first pair of skates. 

and she was even nice enough to share. 

sure, she needs my complete assistance. she always will. but i can tell she enjoys it. and it makes me so happy to see her experiencing something so completely normal. 

irrational? maybe. but definitely a dream come true.